[O' Master by Gagan Thakur]
Many things I need everyday; many things are needed indeed.
Anger, sentiment, hunger and so on. Sometimes, I feel quite nice. Sometimes, I
feel helpless…can find no defence1. Sometimes I think, I will land
up in big trouble—nothing to be done in that case—no defence-mechanism at all.
There are other times, still other times when I think I am in big trouble. I turn my head to see if someone is coming—a
telegram of salvation or help of some other kind.
“Like a dog.”…I remain silent in sorrow and insult.
If it is not like this, i.e. what is stated above, I speak
many things; many things are needed indeed. Many things, I need, are needed. “Fetch
me a glass of water”, I say. “You have been here so long and yet if I tell you
to bring all the things from my shaving-kit, you cannot! You will either forget
the tube or the scissors. If not that, you will at least bungle the match-box
where I keep my foam.”
“Ah! If you could wash them properly and put them back to
their proper places, how good things would have been! ” I say.
Sometimes I tell her to give me a massage around my shoulder
or to go to sleep at other times.
“No…no. you are absolutely good for nothing, to me at least.
I will not keep you. So many days have passed and yet I have to say everything to you.” Fuming in anger,
I say—“You do things only when I drum them into your ears. Otherwise, you
simply remain stock-still.”
Many things I need everyday. This and that are needed. There
is hope in every demand that I will get it alright. For example, “Hey, Asha, fetch
me a glass of water” or “Asha2, the night is not that young anymore.
Come on. Go to sleep now.”
-------------------------
- The word was in English in the Bengali original.
- ‘Asha’ in Bengali
means hope. On a phonetic level it
also puns with ‘asha’, spelt with a different ‘sh’ in Bengali, which means ‘to come’. This
double-pun thus explores the connection between hope and coming. There is
a third semantic possibility in the English word ‘come’ with sexual
overtones that are implicitly present in Sandipan’s original text.
1 comment:
Arka, you have done a great job by translating Sandipan. His short stories should have been translated for Non-Bengali readers during his lifetime. Unfortunately the West Bengali cultural world functions much like a cannibal cabal. I hope this blog of yours is brought to the notice of Non-Bengali readers through various social networks.
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